Please listen up.
I would like to officially announce my candidacy!
For what you ask? EVERYTHING! I have decided that instead of just complaining about the way things are run around here I am going to do something about it. I am going to start with city council in a few years and see how it goes from there. Maybe down the road I will run for President! Highly unlikely but you know... there is no stopping me once I have my mind set on something.
Being on the city council is something I have wanted to do for the past few years but it wasn't until I was sitting in class today that I decided for sure that I am going to do it. Maybe I will fly to Kuala Lumpur as part of a way to keep peace in our city! hahaha.
I am actually really excited! Please support me and please vote for me in five - ten years when I run!
Thursday, May 29, 2008
Half Birthday
Today (well now technically yesterday but I haven't been to bed yet) is my 23 1/2 birthday! Happy Half Birthday to ME! Now.... many of my friends like to post pictures of their children and say their milestones. I don't see why I can't do the same thing for myself. HaHa.
Things I currently Dig
Things I currently Dig
- Cologne. Men who smell nice stay on my mind for days...even if I don't like them
- Guys who know how to dress. Shoes are important. A guy who wears nice shoes says a lot without really speaking to me.
- Charleston Chews. I love this candy & I wonder if I will ever get tired of it
- The Shout Out Louds. A current favorite band.
- Texas Country music. There is just something different about Texas Country.
- Writing and receiving letters to/from Jade.
- Pretty Aprons
- Bosch mixers
- Puppies
- Outdoor activities like hiking, campfires in canyons, wakeboarding......the list goes on
- Being great at budgeting and finding really great deals
- Temple Square
- Daily/Weekly e-mails from REI
- Getting onto Google Reader and seeing 7+ posts from a few hours before ( I am subscribed to about 40 or more blogs)
- People who make jokes at other's expense
- People who write their lower case A's the same as their 2's. Basically like a backwards s.
- People who break promises
- Bad drivers
- Construction on 33rd S.
- My shifting teeth
- My itchy throat
Clarification.
I wish to reply to the comment left on my make love with words blog. Part of this is a reply the other part is a clarification. While it is a reply please let me preface to say this is directed at no INDIVIDUAL.
As a clarification, please forgive me for not stating more clearly that I do not believe there must be conflict to have a great conversation. Please notice that one of those in the short list was a conversation of self worth. What I meant about having a great conversation was a conversation of substance. A conversation where there was something deeper. A conversation where the parties involved dig down deep and offer what they feel. These are true and sincere feelings and something that matters eternally, nationally, or globally; not just for the moment. Conversations of deity, of morals, of why we do what we do. Conversations where neither party has the definite answer but they offer up their hopes and desires.
True, some of the best "conversations" are where nothing has been said at all. But a true CONVERSATION in the literal sense is where each party has formed an opinion irrelevant to anyone else based on feelings, research, and facts.
As a reply let me just say that I really believe it would be an absolute TRADGEDY if someone has gone 21 years of their life without speaking their own opinion for FEAR of being " shut down by others and, i fear,by even myself." If your ideas are indeed "too important" then why on earth would you leave them unsaid?!?! Even if they aren't applied with if they truly are that important they deserve to be heard!! All sides should be examined before reaching a conclusion. How would you know right if there was no wrong? How would we know Grey if we didn't have both black AND white?!? Compromises can be reached and often times the other party has never thought about your side.
If they are too important aren't they deserving of thorough research and knowledge? If you yourself might shut them down then maybe they aren't true or important to begin with. How silly would you be to go your life "believing" in something that you don't TRULY believe in? This could be applied to topics as far spanned as your stance on immigration or whether or not you believe in a God.
Let me tell you a secret. No one really honestly cares WHAT you believe in so long as you have a strong formed opinion on it. Do you think illegal immigration is bad? WHY?!?! Why do you think it is bad? Or do you just hear the word illegal and think it is bad? Have you been trained your whole life to believe it is bad? How silly. Do the homework, find out for yourself.
* I personally used to think it was bad because that is how I was raised. Living in Texas teaches you to hate illegal immigrants. Then I became friends with a few people who I found out later were illegal. (most of them aren't the cross the boarder type either. I guess there goes that whole building a wall argument. They are the come here with Visa's and stay once they are expired type FYI) After taking several economics courses I freely welcome immigrants. This could be a whole post in itself but the point is, most people wouldn't agree with me but I have the facts and numbers to back myself up. Who cares if people agree or disagree? I am out to educate those around me and as least I have a reason for believing what I believe. Hopefully they will be a little more informed after our conversation, even if they never fully agree.
If you think there is a God I would hope you have at least prayed once in your life. I hope you have tried to find out for yourself if there is a God. I hope you don't just do that because your parents said there was a God.
If everyone was like this individual who says they don't like to have conflict I would hate to see what type of world we would live in. The rich would overpower this world so much more than they already do. The top 20% of the wealthy people control 91% of our wealth as it is in the United States. Think about how our government would be run if no one was willing to say HEY! This is what I believe! You are doing things wrong!
Living in Salt Lake I would like to make one last point. Latter Day Saints are roughly half of the Utah population. Think about if Joseph Smith would have been afraid for his ideas to be shut down. I do believe it would affect many of my readers.
Well behaved women rarely make history.
Is it really because they are misbehaved? Or is it because they spoke up when maybe it wasn't the most socially acceptable thing to do?
I guess all I am trying to say is that I don't care who does what in life. I really don't. All I ask is that whatever you DO, do it with a PURPOSE. There are hardly more things in this world that frustrate me more than ignorant people.
As a clarification, please forgive me for not stating more clearly that I do not believe there must be conflict to have a great conversation. Please notice that one of those in the short list was a conversation of self worth. What I meant about having a great conversation was a conversation of substance. A conversation where there was something deeper. A conversation where the parties involved dig down deep and offer what they feel. These are true and sincere feelings and something that matters eternally, nationally, or globally; not just for the moment. Conversations of deity, of morals, of why we do what we do. Conversations where neither party has the definite answer but they offer up their hopes and desires.
True, some of the best "conversations" are where nothing has been said at all. But a true CONVERSATION in the literal sense is where each party has formed an opinion irrelevant to anyone else based on feelings, research, and facts.
As a reply let me just say that I really believe it would be an absolute TRADGEDY if someone has gone 21 years of their life without speaking their own opinion for FEAR of being " shut down by others and, i fear,by even myself." If your ideas are indeed "too important" then why on earth would you leave them unsaid?!?! Even if they aren't applied with if they truly are that important they deserve to be heard!! All sides should be examined before reaching a conclusion. How would you know right if there was no wrong? How would we know Grey if we didn't have both black AND white?!? Compromises can be reached and often times the other party has never thought about your side.
If they are too important aren't they deserving of thorough research and knowledge? If you yourself might shut them down then maybe they aren't true or important to begin with. How silly would you be to go your life "believing" in something that you don't TRULY believe in? This could be applied to topics as far spanned as your stance on immigration or whether or not you believe in a God.
Let me tell you a secret. No one really honestly cares WHAT you believe in so long as you have a strong formed opinion on it. Do you think illegal immigration is bad? WHY?!?! Why do you think it is bad? Or do you just hear the word illegal and think it is bad? Have you been trained your whole life to believe it is bad? How silly. Do the homework, find out for yourself.
* I personally used to think it was bad because that is how I was raised. Living in Texas teaches you to hate illegal immigrants. Then I became friends with a few people who I found out later were illegal. (most of them aren't the cross the boarder type either. I guess there goes that whole building a wall argument. They are the come here with Visa's and stay once they are expired type FYI) After taking several economics courses I freely welcome immigrants. This could be a whole post in itself but the point is, most people wouldn't agree with me but I have the facts and numbers to back myself up. Who cares if people agree or disagree? I am out to educate those around me and as least I have a reason for believing what I believe. Hopefully they will be a little more informed after our conversation, even if they never fully agree.
If you think there is a God I would hope you have at least prayed once in your life. I hope you have tried to find out for yourself if there is a God. I hope you don't just do that because your parents said there was a God.
If everyone was like this individual who says they don't like to have conflict I would hate to see what type of world we would live in. The rich would overpower this world so much more than they already do. The top 20% of the wealthy people control 91% of our wealth as it is in the United States. Think about how our government would be run if no one was willing to say HEY! This is what I believe! You are doing things wrong!
Living in Salt Lake I would like to make one last point. Latter Day Saints are roughly half of the Utah population. Think about if Joseph Smith would have been afraid for his ideas to be shut down. I do believe it would affect many of my readers.
Well behaved women rarely make history.
Is it really because they are misbehaved? Or is it because they spoke up when maybe it wasn't the most socially acceptable thing to do?
I guess all I am trying to say is that I don't care who does what in life. I really don't. All I ask is that whatever you DO, do it with a PURPOSE. There are hardly more things in this world that frustrate me more than ignorant people.
Monday, May 26, 2008
Adventures
My best friend lived in Iceland for a while and is now in Taiwan for the next year.
When catching up with an old friend from high school he asked if I was still in Utah. I said Yes. I asked if he was still in Austin or if he moved back to Houston. His answer?
"oh I am on the boarder of Kuala Lumpur and (insert some other country here) about to catch a train to (insert another country here)
Freak! I am sooooo unadventurous! I can't do it! I am not spontaneous. Not in the least. I am soooooo safe and predictable. Why can't I be in Kuala Lumpur? Why can't I go to Taiwan?
Because I will never take the risk. That's why. I am going to Kuala Lumpur! I swear I am!
When catching up with an old friend from high school he asked if I was still in Utah. I said Yes. I asked if he was still in Austin or if he moved back to Houston. His answer?
"oh I am on the boarder of Kuala Lumpur and (insert some other country here) about to catch a train to (insert another country here)
Freak! I am sooooo unadventurous! I can't do it! I am not spontaneous. Not in the least. I am soooooo safe and predictable. Why can't I be in Kuala Lumpur? Why can't I go to Taiwan?
Because I will never take the risk. That's why. I am going to Kuala Lumpur! I swear I am!
Mantra
I came across something the other day I have been thinking about ever since. It is simple but so strong at the same time.
Do It Once.
Do It Right.
NEVER
Do It Again!
This can be applied to so many aspects of our life. Instead of telling you what in particular I feel about this I will let you meditate on it. I hope you get as much out of it as I did and still am.
Do It Once.
Do It Right.
NEVER
Do It Again!
This can be applied to so many aspects of our life. Instead of telling you what in particular I feel about this I will let you meditate on it. I hope you get as much out of it as I did and still am.
Make Love With Words
I remember getting a text message late one night/early one morning from one Ms. Jade Ozawa. She was excited because she had just had a long talk with a friend and as she described it she "made love with words." I saved that text message in my phone. I saved a few text messages from her in my phone. Ones I always wanted to remember. Ones that would be safe from accidental deletion. When she left on her religious mission and the only way I could contact her was through the centuries old tradition of mail I was devastated. Do you have any earthly idea just how long it takes a letter to go to Taiwan and for her to respond back and send it back to America? Neither do I but it seems like eternity! While that was beyond my control I always had a few of her words at my fingertips. Alas, my phone has decided to revolt against me and no longer wished to work. Not because I dropped it, not because it was old, not for any seemingly understandable reason other than that it was exhausted and wished no longer to do the work of this world it was designed to do. Hmph. I wish I had that luxury! I had to get a new phone and those messages saved from harm are gone. "Made love with words" will stay with me for a while though.
One of the things I love most about Ms. Ozawa is that we are so much alike. We seek useless knowledge and comfort in words. Words are our passion. Just as she got excited enough to text me about this event, I am excited enough to blog about it. I have had three great stimulating conversations this week! Ones about politics, religion, and self worth. Conversations that were thought about, carefully constructed, and backed with reason. I can't tell you how much I enjoy mental stimulation.
As much fun as
"Bobby is so cute!"
" Can you believe that Kyle told Stephanie about Tiffany's dog's mother's original owner's?"
and other useless conversations are.... I really enjoy being able to talk about things of more significance. What makes a conversation (notice...conversation NOT debate) even more enjoyable is when the person has an opposing view! It makes me smile! A CHALLENGE! I always love a good intrigue. I love listening to how people feel and why they feel that way. That doesn't mean I agree but it opens my eyes to a new perspective.
Anyhow... I enjoy useless conversation as well. It just makes life that much more worth living when you have a GREAT conversation. When you... "make love with words."
One of the things I love most about Ms. Ozawa is that we are so much alike. We seek useless knowledge and comfort in words. Words are our passion. Just as she got excited enough to text me about this event, I am excited enough to blog about it. I have had three great stimulating conversations this week! Ones about politics, religion, and self worth. Conversations that were thought about, carefully constructed, and backed with reason. I can't tell you how much I enjoy mental stimulation.
As much fun as
"Bobby is so cute!"
" Can you believe that Kyle told Stephanie about Tiffany's dog's mother's original owner's?"
and other useless conversations are.... I really enjoy being able to talk about things of more significance. What makes a conversation (notice...conversation NOT debate) even more enjoyable is when the person has an opposing view! It makes me smile! A CHALLENGE! I always love a good intrigue. I love listening to how people feel and why they feel that way. That doesn't mean I agree but it opens my eyes to a new perspective.
Anyhow... I enjoy useless conversation as well. It just makes life that much more worth living when you have a GREAT conversation. When you... "make love with words."
Thursday, May 22, 2008
Solitude
I really like being by myself.
It is this attitude that brings me to the realization I will most likely be by myself for the rest of my life.
Forever. Always.
Most of my heart enjoys the thought of this.
Part of my heart is scared of the thought of this.
Most of the time I wonder what my purpose is.
Is my time up?
I feel done.
It is this attitude that brings me to the realization I will most likely be by myself for the rest of my life.
Forever. Always.
Most of my heart enjoys the thought of this.
Part of my heart is scared of the thought of this.
Most of the time I wonder what my purpose is.
Is my time up?
I feel done.
Tuesday, May 20, 2008
Sarcasm
I had a longer post on sarcasm but I think I will wait to post it. The problem is... people have not been understanding my sarcasm lately. I am always sarcastic. ALWAYS. If I am not being sarcastic I am dead serious or writing, but writing falls into the serious category. Sarcasm first started for me when I felt an answer didn't deserve a reply and then it developed into a sense of humor- mostly because I felt the majority of my peers were dimwits and it was funny to be the only one in an inside joke. Now it has evolved into a way of life. Sarcasm has backfired on me lately.
Should I ditch the people who don't get my sarcasm or should I ditch the sarcasm?
Should I ditch the people who don't get my sarcasm or should I ditch the sarcasm?
Nothing Really.
For those of you who read my most recent post I apologize. Really it was one specific person who pushed me over the edge. I have deleted it for the time being. I really should be more positive and upbeat.
I feel like I have a lot to say but I don't really feel like posting too much.
I feel like I have a lot to say but I don't really feel like posting too much.
Thursday, May 15, 2008
Boxing Praise
So... I took a 6 week hiatus from boxing due to graduation, vacations, and finals. I went back tonight and ummmm... I THOUGHT I WAS GOING TO DIE! If you go for a while it actually get "easy" and you don't almost faint every class and it is a hard work out but doable.
Tonight I Was ready to throw up ten minutes into the class. In fact, I had to step outside and I actually DID. After the conditioning was over and we got to the boxing I still felt kind of horrible. As I am sparring with the teacher and throwing out the punches she calls she just grunts out "THESE ARE SO F'ING GOOD I CAN'T EVEN BELIEVE IT!" Despite the profanity (she said the real word) (OK I must admit, in retrospect it was probably BECAUSE of the profanity) I felt really hard core at that moment in time. Because I felt really hard core I had to keep my grin concealed but man was I grinning from ear to ear inside! Eliza is soooooo hard core so for her to give a compliment is something to brag about. She may give encouragement but she doesn't hand out compliments!! She kept commenting on how good I had gotten. I must admit I DID practice at home when I was actively going to class but I haven't practiced for a while. 6 weeks to be exact! She even gave me and my co worker an invitation to a sparring class. I felt really honored! I can't make it due to scheduling but sheesh!
Now... if only I can get the conditioning down!
Tonight I Was ready to throw up ten minutes into the class. In fact, I had to step outside and I actually DID. After the conditioning was over and we got to the boxing I still felt kind of horrible. As I am sparring with the teacher and throwing out the punches she calls she just grunts out "THESE ARE SO F'ING GOOD I CAN'T EVEN BELIEVE IT!" Despite the profanity (she said the real word) (OK I must admit, in retrospect it was probably BECAUSE of the profanity) I felt really hard core at that moment in time. Because I felt really hard core I had to keep my grin concealed but man was I grinning from ear to ear inside! Eliza is soooooo hard core so for her to give a compliment is something to brag about. She may give encouragement but she doesn't hand out compliments!! She kept commenting on how good I had gotten. I must admit I DID practice at home when I was actively going to class but I haven't practiced for a while. 6 weeks to be exact! She even gave me and my co worker an invitation to a sparring class. I felt really honored! I can't make it due to scheduling but sheesh!
Now... if only I can get the conditioning down!
Tuesday, May 13, 2008
9:45
I was almost in bed smiling with joy when I thought this should be documented. For years my bedtime was 9...9:30 max. Jan 1, 2007 led to a bed time of 3 or 4 am that has barely been broken. My goal for 2008? Go to bed by 9:30... I am not there yet...but I am pretty dang close! I am so excited for sleep! Good night! Sleep tight... don't let the bed bugs bite and sweet dreams!
Sunday, May 11, 2008
Frustration
OK. I swear I need to start another blog. One that fits my rants and raves and one for the descriptions of my life. Today's blog is a rant.
I HATE WOMEN'S JEANS!
Seriously. I am sorry for wasting your time and please feel free to just ignore this blog altogether and not read it. I am having some serious issues right now. I mean do you ever hear a guy complaining that he can never find the right jeans? No! Well... I haven't. I am sure there are guys out there that do but comparatively they just don't complain about it as much as women. Women's jeans just don't ever fit. It is so hard to find the right pair and to top it off I HATE THE WAIST LINES!
Has anyone ever thought that I don't care to s my underwear every time I sit down? I don't feel like buying extra long shirts or pulling down my shirt every time I have to stand up or sit down? I also hate seeing other girls butt cracks all the time. Stop the madness! Create jeans that cover!I feel so old but the past few pairs of pants I have bought have the highest waist possible and they aren't even that high.
I am going to start designing my own line of jeans. Ones that fit women who are too old to be wearing jeans where the zipper is an eight of inch long because then you are at the waist.
hmph
I HATE WOMEN'S JEANS!
Seriously. I am sorry for wasting your time and please feel free to just ignore this blog altogether and not read it. I am having some serious issues right now. I mean do you ever hear a guy complaining that he can never find the right jeans? No! Well... I haven't. I am sure there are guys out there that do but comparatively they just don't complain about it as much as women. Women's jeans just don't ever fit. It is so hard to find the right pair and to top it off I HATE THE WAIST LINES!
Has anyone ever thought that I don't care to s my underwear every time I sit down? I don't feel like buying extra long shirts or pulling down my shirt every time I have to stand up or sit down? I also hate seeing other girls butt cracks all the time. Stop the madness! Create jeans that cover!I feel so old but the past few pairs of pants I have bought have the highest waist possible and they aren't even that high.
I am going to start designing my own line of jeans. Ones that fit women who are too old to be wearing jeans where the zipper is an eight of inch long because then you are at the waist.
hmph
Saturday, May 10, 2008
LP 08
I spent the past five days of my life in Lake Powell for the first time in my life. There were many highlights. A few of those?
"My hair is the definition of sex",
getting up for the very first time on a wakeboard ( I have only ever gotten up for real on ski's) and biffing it several times trying to get out of the wake but doing it none the less,
campfires at night,
trips to Page, Arizona to watch the Jazz Game,
listening to a rendition of "shake it for Jesus"
car rides and ridiculously loud singing,
laying out in the sun for hours on end,
being on a boat.
making new friends
There are many more. I will post pictures later and maybe even tell some funny stories. Let's just say that if I didn't look Hispanic before I definitely look that, or black, now!
Sunday, May 04, 2008
Whew
Wow... well the last relative is on the plane headed home and my whirlwind week is finally over. There are so many things that have happened this week I just don't think I could ever come close to writing about it all. When I look back to where I was seven days ago so much has happened and changed. Finals were over on Wednesday and my parents flew in that night. I got to see my brother and my mom and my dad and have lots of hugs and kisses and adoration!
I love my family so much. I don't think I could ever express that enough. Thursday was such a good day! My family and I got to spend some unique time together. I don't think I have ever seen my dad smile so much as he did Thursday.
Friday was graduation and it was pretty fun. It was kind of long and boring and pointless but even I have to admit that it was fun to get dressed up and take pictures and have my parents cheer for me as they called my name.
As much as I am going to miss their hugs I am so grateful they were able to be in for just two and a half short days and they got to focus on just me! I was grateful for their hugs and knowing how proud they were of me. I am a lucky duck to have them in my life!
Wednesday, April 30, 2008
SapioSexual
Definition of sapiosexuality :.
(sā-pē-ō-sĕk-shü-ăl'ĭ-tē)
1. 1. (n.) A behavior of becoming attracted to or aroused by intelligence and its use.
Origins: From the Latin root sapien, wise or intelligent, and Latin sexualis, relating to the sexes.
Example: Me? I don't care too much about the looks. I want an incisive, inquisitive, insightful, irreverent mind. I want someone for whom philosophical discussion is foreplay. I want someone who sometimes makes me go ouch due to their wit and evil sense of humor. I want someone that I can reach out and touch randomly. I want someone I can cuddle with. I decided this all means that I am sapiosexual.
Submitted by: Anonymous, Topics: Behavior & Lifestyle, Love & Romance
I want to make sure I post on this as well so I am writing a pre-post if you will. I might just expound on this as well later.
I was recently informed that the correct word to describe me is sapiosexual.
1) I am in love with the word (which in itself probably describes WHY I am sapiosexual
2) I am glad that someone finally found a word to describe me. (kudos goes to Huber)
In this young single world I live in girls often talk about the type of guys you like. Over and over again I reply that I don't really have a type. I quickly correct myself because 98% of the guys I have dated/are attracted to are tall and have dark brown hair. Eye color varies. In that past three years or so I have also added another quality.
I AM ATTRACTED TO SMART MEN!
I can't help it! Two very handsome men could be next to each other. No.... one mind blowingly hot guy could be next to his slightly less than average friend. The slightly average man opens his mouth and starts talking about something smart and the hot guy has no clue what he is saying.( I on the other hand usually do, but when I don't ALL THE BETTER) And I want to offer my body to the less than average guy. Slightly true story. I would never offer my body to anyone but I think you get the point.
I suppose it came from nearly marrying one of the most unmotivated unintelligent guys out there. That was a turning point for me. That is not how I want to live my life.I am smart. VERY smart. I am tired of being the hard working smart one in the relationship. I don't want to be the one in charge for the rest of my life merely because I am the only one that knows anything. I want someone who challenges my mind, my views, and someone I can have a great conversation with! I want someone to completely show me up in a conversation because...well that's just sexy. I am sorry, if you are cute but a complete retard, I just want no association with you. As it is I am trying to weed out my unintelligent friends, I don't need another person to add to the list.
So next time you see me walking down the street with a less than average guy... just know that he blows my mind. Literally.
(sā-pē-ō-sĕk-shü-ăl'ĭ-tē)
1. 1. (n.) A behavior of becoming attracted to or aroused by intelligence and its use.
Origins: From the Latin root sapien, wise or intelligent, and Latin sexualis, relating to the sexes.
Example: Me? I don't care too much about the looks. I want an incisive, inquisitive, insightful, irreverent mind. I want someone for whom philosophical discussion is foreplay. I want someone who sometimes makes me go ouch due to their wit and evil sense of humor. I want someone that I can reach out and touch randomly. I want someone I can cuddle with. I decided this all means that I am sapiosexual.
Submitted by: Anonymous, Topics: Behavior & Lifestyle, Love & Romance
I want to make sure I post on this as well so I am writing a pre-post if you will. I might just expound on this as well later.
I was recently informed that the correct word to describe me is sapiosexual.
1) I am in love with the word (which in itself probably describes WHY I am sapiosexual
2) I am glad that someone finally found a word to describe me. (kudos goes to Huber)
In this young single world I live in girls often talk about the type of guys you like. Over and over again I reply that I don't really have a type. I quickly correct myself because 98% of the guys I have dated/are attracted to are tall and have dark brown hair. Eye color varies. In that past three years or so I have also added another quality.
I AM ATTRACTED TO SMART MEN!
I can't help it! Two very handsome men could be next to each other. No.... one mind blowingly hot guy could be next to his slightly less than average friend. The slightly average man opens his mouth and starts talking about something smart and the hot guy has no clue what he is saying.( I on the other hand usually do, but when I don't ALL THE BETTER) And I want to offer my body to the less than average guy. Slightly true story. I would never offer my body to anyone but I think you get the point.
I suppose it came from nearly marrying one of the most unmotivated unintelligent guys out there. That was a turning point for me. That is not how I want to live my life.I am smart. VERY smart. I am tired of being the hard working smart one in the relationship. I don't want to be the one in charge for the rest of my life merely because I am the only one that knows anything. I want someone who challenges my mind, my views, and someone I can have a great conversation with! I want someone to completely show me up in a conversation because...well that's just sexy. I am sorry, if you are cute but a complete retard, I just want no association with you. As it is I am trying to weed out my unintelligent friends, I don't need another person to add to the list.
So next time you see me walking down the street with a less than average guy... just know that he blows my mind. Literally.
The Second
Doing his famous Zoolander Face.My little/younger/only brother was named after my dad. He does have a suffix on his name though. II. I love it.
I am off to take a final in just a few short minutes so this will be brief and most likely expounded upon in greater detail in the following days.
I love my brother with all of my heart! He gets on my EVER lovin last nerves sometimes but he is the only brother I have. He is one of my best friends. He treats me as if he looks up to me. I look up to him sometimes. I have only seen him cry once after the age of 10 and it was due to serious illness when he had to be taken to the hospital. He called me crying another time. He is one of the most amazing men I have ever met. He is dedicated, hardworking, and a true southern gentlemen.
I suppose one of the reasons I never date anyone for long is because no one ever treats me with half the respect or chivalry my brother treats me with. My phrase is, "if my brother does it for me I expect the guy I am dating to do it for me." If you can't open my car door or the door in general, get the heck out of here. That is just a basic. My brother makes sure that all four of his sisters and his dear mother are treated with the utmost respect.
He is our knight in shining armor.
P.S. He is flying in to Salt Lake today and I haven't seen him in a long time so that's the reason for the post.
Sunday, April 27, 2008
Could It Be?
Could this really be lucky post 100?
Well now I feel obligated to post something deserving of post #100.
I can't think of anything.
Alas, I will just do what I came here to do.
I have decided I have many gifts & talents.
I think too often we try to demean ourselves or not give ourselves enough credit. Something I decided long ago was to actually ACCEPT a compliment. When a cute guy tells you that you look pretty don't go on to explain how wretchedly gross you look. NO. He obviously thought you were pretty and secondly he thought enough and had enough guts to say it out loud. Don't contradict his opinion... say THANK YOU. Do it with a smile even. I can often be found halfway doing this lately. Someone will tell me how gorgeous I look and I will be like "eww sick. I FEEL gross but THANK YOU so much! I really appreciate it!" I mean seriously... who doesn't like a compliment ESPECIALLY when you feel you look gross? I like to think of this as a talent I have developed recently.
I also think I am a great friend, a decent cook, a dependable person, a devoted and monogamous girlfriend (not currently but whenever I date), a lover of words, a great employee and co-worker, a great conversationalist over the phone, an intelligent human being, and lots lots more.
Do you want to know what my best talent is though? Procrastinating!
HaHa. Of all my talents I think procrastinating (mostly only when it comes to school- which is exactly what I am doing now) is my best! I don't normally procrastinate in day to day events; just studying. I have spent the past three hours on other people's blogs. It has made me think about why we love to read the intimate thoughts of others so much. I mean this is not a new concept. The Diary of Anne Frank, Zlata's Diary, & Go Ask Alice were three of my favorite "books" growing up. In my seventh grade reading class with Ms. VanHorn I remember my peers doing their book readings on some pointless fiction book. Leave it to me to read from the diary of a drug addict; I floored her and got an A. Well, both flooring Ms. VanHorn and receiving an A were two very easily attainable goals back in 7th grade. I don't know that I made a B on anything until High School and even then it was rare.
I suppose a blog is a more convenient way, a more twenty-first century way to read into the trials and turmoils of other people's lives. I feel it makes us (or at least me) feel validated and not alone in my quiet suffering. It can also make me keep hoping for the perfect ending to my own story. It can make me realize the blessings I have in my life. It can also be just an update on a friend's life, but for one blog, it is an encouragement to keep moving along. I mean don't get me wrong my life is AWESOME. I have some many great things in my life if I even tried to list them all I would die before I finished writing them all. Little things are great as well. In spite of the most awful day in MandiScandal history on Thursday, March 24, 2008 I am also now grateful for things such as money in my bank account for unexpected things such as a broken car and shopping sprees. I am grateful for a working phone (it temporarily broke Thursday night) and the Rockets winning a game against the Jazz Thursday night. I am grateful for an upcoming visit from my brother and my parents and one of my sisters for my graduation to name a few. However, even though there are great things in life it still leaves me with the inner debate about where I stand in my life.
I am constantly debating about my life. Should I pick up and move to Europe for a year? Should I join the military, take those pilot classes I have always wanted? Should I go against almost everything I stand for and become unpredictable and impulsive? Should I go against the known and release all of my fears that keep me back? Should I ask a cute boy out just because I can (also something that goes against every moral of my being!)? I mean this blog is about LIVING DELIBERATELY right? I fight myself about this issue almost everyday, and I think so do many other people. I mean, click one of the names to the right of my blog and you will see the blogs of many of my friends who have the perfect life. They are gorgeous, smart, educated, married to the perfect man. They will have 3.2 children and be in the most ideal marriage. They will have the huge house with the white picketed fence and will have the most adorable dog that sits in the window and their Christmas cards will be so cute it will make you want to puke. I know that exists in this world. People DO get their story tale.
But so many of us don't. So many of us are beaten and broken and we go through trials and we are holding on to the edge of the cliff by our fingertips hoping and praying everyday that we have enough courage & strength to keep holding on. I think the challenge is to keep smiling when you are hanging there looking at the scenery around you and you realize that unless you were barely holding on you would have never stopped to look at everything from that view. Even if we fall the joy would be to gather all the pieces we broke into and give someone those pieces and hope they can help make you whole again.
Lyrics can fit into this blog category as well. They are the inner feelings of people expressed with music. Blogs & lyrics, a saving grace for me to not feel alone in this world. It makes me feel OK to have a bad day or to have a smile on my face but to feel crappy inside. I am not alone and neither are you.
This is my talent. Procrastination.
Well now I feel obligated to post something deserving of post #100.
I can't think of anything.
Alas, I will just do what I came here to do.
I have decided I have many gifts & talents.
I think too often we try to demean ourselves or not give ourselves enough credit. Something I decided long ago was to actually ACCEPT a compliment. When a cute guy tells you that you look pretty don't go on to explain how wretchedly gross you look. NO. He obviously thought you were pretty and secondly he thought enough and had enough guts to say it out loud. Don't contradict his opinion... say THANK YOU. Do it with a smile even. I can often be found halfway doing this lately. Someone will tell me how gorgeous I look and I will be like "eww sick. I FEEL gross but THANK YOU so much! I really appreciate it!" I mean seriously... who doesn't like a compliment ESPECIALLY when you feel you look gross? I like to think of this as a talent I have developed recently.
I also think I am a great friend, a decent cook, a dependable person, a devoted and monogamous girlfriend (not currently but whenever I date), a lover of words, a great employee and co-worker, a great conversationalist over the phone, an intelligent human being, and lots lots more.
Do you want to know what my best talent is though? Procrastinating!
HaHa. Of all my talents I think procrastinating (mostly only when it comes to school- which is exactly what I am doing now) is my best! I don't normally procrastinate in day to day events; just studying. I have spent the past three hours on other people's blogs. It has made me think about why we love to read the intimate thoughts of others so much. I mean this is not a new concept. The Diary of Anne Frank, Zlata's Diary, & Go Ask Alice were three of my favorite "books" growing up. In my seventh grade reading class with Ms. VanHorn I remember my peers doing their book readings on some pointless fiction book. Leave it to me to read from the diary of a drug addict; I floored her and got an A. Well, both flooring Ms. VanHorn and receiving an A were two very easily attainable goals back in 7th grade. I don't know that I made a B on anything until High School and even then it was rare.
I suppose a blog is a more convenient way, a more twenty-first century way to read into the trials and turmoils of other people's lives. I feel it makes us (or at least me) feel validated and not alone in my quiet suffering. It can also make me keep hoping for the perfect ending to my own story. It can make me realize the blessings I have in my life. It can also be just an update on a friend's life, but for one blog, it is an encouragement to keep moving along. I mean don't get me wrong my life is AWESOME. I have some many great things in my life if I even tried to list them all I would die before I finished writing them all. Little things are great as well. In spite of the most awful day in MandiScandal history on Thursday, March 24, 2008 I am also now grateful for things such as money in my bank account for unexpected things such as a broken car and shopping sprees. I am grateful for a working phone (it temporarily broke Thursday night) and the Rockets winning a game against the Jazz Thursday night. I am grateful for an upcoming visit from my brother and my parents and one of my sisters for my graduation to name a few. However, even though there are great things in life it still leaves me with the inner debate about where I stand in my life.
I am constantly debating about my life. Should I pick up and move to Europe for a year? Should I join the military, take those pilot classes I have always wanted? Should I go against almost everything I stand for and become unpredictable and impulsive? Should I go against the known and release all of my fears that keep me back? Should I ask a cute boy out just because I can (also something that goes against every moral of my being!)? I mean this blog is about LIVING DELIBERATELY right? I fight myself about this issue almost everyday, and I think so do many other people. I mean, click one of the names to the right of my blog and you will see the blogs of many of my friends who have the perfect life. They are gorgeous, smart, educated, married to the perfect man. They will have 3.2 children and be in the most ideal marriage. They will have the huge house with the white picketed fence and will have the most adorable dog that sits in the window and their Christmas cards will be so cute it will make you want to puke. I know that exists in this world. People DO get their story tale.
But so many of us don't. So many of us are beaten and broken and we go through trials and we are holding on to the edge of the cliff by our fingertips hoping and praying everyday that we have enough courage & strength to keep holding on. I think the challenge is to keep smiling when you are hanging there looking at the scenery around you and you realize that unless you were barely holding on you would have never stopped to look at everything from that view. Even if we fall the joy would be to gather all the pieces we broke into and give someone those pieces and hope they can help make you whole again.
Lyrics can fit into this blog category as well. They are the inner feelings of people expressed with music. Blogs & lyrics, a saving grace for me to not feel alone in this world. It makes me feel OK to have a bad day or to have a smile on my face but to feel crappy inside. I am not alone and neither are you.
This is my talent. Procrastination.
Thursday, April 24, 2008
Houston Rockets
Never in my life I have ever let the outcome of a sports game affect my day. Until Wednesday that is. Everyone keeps giving me crap about how much Houston sucks and only use the Rockets to prove their point since the Jazz beat them twice at home in the first two games.
Today was one of the worst days of my life.
Is it wrong of me to think that I know Heavenly Father loves me for letting the Rockets win tonight? I don't know what I would have done if to top off my horrible night the Jazz won (most of my co workers were at the game tonight) and then I had to hear all about it tomorrow. I would probably cry. I can't deal with this stress right now.
Thank you for the win Rockets. I knew you would pull through!
Today was one of the worst days of my life.
Is it wrong of me to think that I know Heavenly Father loves me for letting the Rockets win tonight? I don't know what I would have done if to top off my horrible night the Jazz won (most of my co workers were at the game tonight) and then I had to hear all about it tomorrow. I would probably cry. I can't deal with this stress right now.
Thank you for the win Rockets. I knew you would pull through!
Sunshine & Snow
I am deleting my myspace account. There was one blog from there that I wanted to keep. so.. here it is. IT is from my birthday.
8:18 AM - SUNSHINE AND SNOW?!?!
Someone called me sunshine yesterday..... it made my day! It immediately put a smile on my face!! I LOVE being called sunshine!! Ironically enough, after they said it like two other people called me sunshine! Last night was our first big storm so there is snow everywhere! Love it!
Here is a list I am sure will be continued....so far....
THINGS I AM GRATEFUL FOR ON MY 23RD BIRTHDAY
1) Spending the night with and waking up with Ms. Jade Ozawa...one of my favorite friends
2) Having the majority of my friends and immediate family contact me before 5:00am this morning to tell me Happy Birthday (with the exception of Irene who called at 7 am)
3) Cannont be listed.
4) Waking up to a Winter Wonderland without having to scrape off the snow from my car or deal with messy streets....they had already been cleaned off and the snow has left the whole valley WHITE! LOVE IT!
5) Getting to wear jeans today to work
6) Getting Dr. Pepper, Rockstar energy drink (possibly my two favorite carbonated liquids EVER) and cute presents from co-workers
7) Being treated to lunch by my bosses who don't celebrate birthdays.
8) Having my car "kill" and running into a pole but not hitting anyone on the road & not getting a scratch on my car besides having to get a new wheel
9) Money in my bank account
10) Having a friend give me the BEST mani/pedi EVER recieved that lasted approximately two and half hours
11) Being sung Happy Birthday to two nights in a row in a resturant
12) Knowing my sister got custody of her children!
13) Recieving multiple calls & facebook messages
14) Watching Drop Dead Fred!
15) Not having to go to class tonight b/c it was my birthday
16) Having my dad send me an e-mail at work telling me he missed his princess
17) Recieving a call from my friend's little daughters singing me Happy Birthday
18) Getting a date to winter formal
19)This list could go on to 50!!
Thanks to all those that made my ordinary day a really special day! I guess it's true that things are always the best when you weren't expecting anything at all. I have never asked for anything for my birthday but this is more than I could ever ask for. I don't need anything big & extravegant.... it has always been the little things that have counted!!
8:18 AM - SUNSHINE AND SNOW?!?!
Someone called me sunshine yesterday..... it made my day! It immediately put a smile on my face!! I LOVE being called sunshine!! Ironically enough, after they said it like two other people called me sunshine! Last night was our first big storm so there is snow everywhere! Love it!
Here is a list I am sure will be continued....so far....
THINGS I AM GRATEFUL FOR ON MY 23RD BIRTHDAY
1) Spending the night with and waking up with Ms. Jade Ozawa...one of my favorite friends
2) Having the majority of my friends and immediate family contact me before 5:00am this morning to tell me Happy Birthday (with the exception of Irene who called at 7 am)
3) Cannont be listed.
4) Waking up to a Winter Wonderland without having to scrape off the snow from my car or deal with messy streets....they had already been cleaned off and the snow has left the whole valley WHITE! LOVE IT!
5) Getting to wear jeans today to work
6) Getting Dr. Pepper, Rockstar energy drink (possibly my two favorite carbonated liquids EVER) and cute presents from co-workers
7) Being treated to lunch by my bosses who don't celebrate birthdays.
8) Having my car "kill" and running into a pole but not hitting anyone on the road & not getting a scratch on my car besides having to get a new wheel
9) Money in my bank account
10) Having a friend give me the BEST mani/pedi EVER recieved that lasted approximately two and half hours
11) Being sung Happy Birthday to two nights in a row in a resturant
12) Knowing my sister got custody of her children!
13) Recieving multiple calls & facebook messages
14) Watching Drop Dead Fred!
15) Not having to go to class tonight b/c it was my birthday
16) Having my dad send me an e-mail at work telling me he missed his princess
17) Recieving a call from my friend's little daughters singing me Happy Birthday
18) Getting a date to winter formal
19)This list could go on to 50!!
Thanks to all those that made my ordinary day a really special day! I guess it's true that things are always the best when you weren't expecting anything at all. I have never asked for anything for my birthday but this is more than I could ever ask for. I don't need anything big & extravegant.... it has always been the little things that have counted!!
Thursday, April 17, 2008
A First
Something interesting happened to me today. I had my first real anxiety attack! Let me tell you, when people tell me they had an anxiety attack or a panic attack I took it very lightly. I took it with as much interest and concern as I would have if they told me they had a sandwich for lunch. I mean, we all stress out and suffer from anxiety every now and then right?
I had no clue how INTENSE they are! It said that most last about five minutes. Lucky me... mine lasted for an hour and a half.Now that it is over, I am very glad I had the experience. I mean...to think... I could have gone my whole life and never have known the joy of complete loss of control of your body (good thing I was driving and pulled over so I was sitting in my car),uncontrollable hyperventilating, feeling like I was going to pass out, and quite possibly die all at the same time!! When I got home I goggled to see what causes them and just to find out more about them. I felt better when I read that most people feel it is one of the most frightening things that happens to them in their lives. I CONCUR! I also felt better when it said that most first timers seek emergency attention.
So... lesson to all of you young children reading this at home... DON'T...I say... DON'T go without sleeping (especially more than 48 hours) and live off of energy drinks under severe pressure times in your life! hahaha. Well... maybe you should do it. How boring would life be unless you experience this at least once? But... if you do it, you have to beat my time of an hour and a half. Five minutes is nothing!! hahahaa.
I had no clue how INTENSE they are! It said that most last about five minutes. Lucky me... mine lasted for an hour and a half.Now that it is over, I am very glad I had the experience. I mean...to think... I could have gone my whole life and never have known the joy of complete loss of control of your body (good thing I was driving and pulled over so I was sitting in my car),uncontrollable hyperventilating, feeling like I was going to pass out, and quite possibly die all at the same time!! When I got home I goggled to see what causes them and just to find out more about them. I felt better when I read that most people feel it is one of the most frightening things that happens to them in their lives. I CONCUR! I also felt better when it said that most first timers seek emergency attention.
So... lesson to all of you young children reading this at home... DON'T...I say... DON'T go without sleeping (especially more than 48 hours) and live off of energy drinks under severe pressure times in your life! hahaha. Well... maybe you should do it. How boring would life be unless you experience this at least once? But... if you do it, you have to beat my time of an hour and a half. Five minutes is nothing!! hahahaa.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
