A Change of Heart?

I have been searching for the right words. 

So much has gone through my head in the past 7 days and I don't know how to explain it all.

You know how when you break a bone if you can get is set correctly it will heal back fine?

But if it starts healing wrong, sometimes the DR has to break it again, just so it will heal correctly.

Well... my heart was broken once but it healed fine. I think because I broke it myself so I knew how to put it back together. The last time it was broken, someone else did it. He was brutal and there were pieces strewn everywhere. I was too hurt to try and bring them back together and it never really healed. Or rather, it healed incorrectly.

I have been so closed off to everyone for the past year or two since that happened. He didn't deserve me thinking about him and since the day we last talked I haven't given him a passing notice in my thoughts until lately. And it seems in the past few days so many memories have come flooding back through dreams and other events that it has been painful. It is painful to think of the events that unfolded and slowly my heart has started to break again. The good news is that I know where the pieces go this time. I think it is healing. I am ready to attempt risking it again.

It took a lot for me to say that but I am glad I am possibly making a recovery.