A Few observations

One of my all time favorite hobbies is people watching. With the start of the semester today came many observations. Here are just a few of my favorites.

Diet Coke- Why is it that every single last one of my teachers is addicted to diet coke? I almost jumped out of my seat with pointer finger ready and screamed IMPOSTOR to the teacher of my last class of the day. For the past year and a half that I have been here at the U almost 100 % of my teachers constantly drink diet coke during class. I wonder if they have some sort of endorsement deal with the company...(there was one exception with one teacher who was addicted to coffee...) so you must understand my confusedness when I walked into class and there was no diet coke. I figured he must be a new guy- he doesn't know the rules about teaching here at the University of Utah-but no, he has been teaching here since 1993. I then concluded that this endorsement deal wasn't around back then... so he was exempt. Phew- that was a close one. I almost embarrassed myself in front of the class.

BYU Guy- So... there are a lot of people that go to my school. It is not uncommon to see a sea of red with people supporting our school with the apparel they choose to wear. Every once in a while you will find a sweatshirt sporting a professional sports team or even the occasional NYU shirt or Georgia Tech or some RANDOM place of the sort. This is OK because they obviously have some sort of affinity for the area, the person that gave them the item, or whatever. However, today as I walked into my economics & law class I stopped dead in my tracks and gave the DIRTIEST look to this guy who was wearing a BYU beanie. First off, C'MON MAN!! Show some respect! Do NOT sport the apparel of the school from Satan here on this holy ground! OK so BYU isn't the school of Satan but that is our rival. Do you understand how STUPID you look by wearing that on campus? People just give you dirty looks and think, " sucks to be you. you couldn't get into the school of your dreams," and I am sure the gangsta football players perceive it as a neon sign saying you want to get jumped. Also, if you are going to wear the beanie, for the LOVE, please wear it right! He had it pulled down past his eyebrows. Hmm....maybe he lost a bet and was trying to conceal his identity while wearing the beanie. My last comment about BYU beanie guy is that he was VERY RUDE during class.... originally I concluded he was bitter about going not being at BYU but now I think maybe he did lose a bet. I would be mad if I had to wear BYU apparel too! OK BYU beanie guy, you are pardoned for now... but if I catch you doing it again I will be forced to give you a wedgie.

My last comment for the night ( I was much more long winded than I thought I would be) is about the quirkiness of people, especially at night. As I got out of class at 8pm I was walking towards my car that was parked across campus a bit. This is always a good time to see funny people. There was one lady who was probably late 30's wearing very frumpy kahkis ( you know the type- the ones with the saggy butt-) and those weird thick rebok shoes. Well... I guess she was trying to get her exercise in for the day? As she left the building about the same time as me, she probably got to her car five minutes sooner. Part of this is because we all know I am the slowest walker to ...er...walk the face of the planet. However, saggy butt decided to run in spurts. Yes, I said it. Spurts. 5 second spurts to be exact, ( I know because I timed it) She would walk and then run for five seconds, walk for 3 seconds, and then run again. It was really odd to watch. She turned around a couple of times to see if anyone was watching her, and kept at it.

There are a lot more things I could comment about for today but honestly ? I have been ready for bed for hours.

My Grandma

I love this woman more than I love a lot of things. She is amazing.

Blog

Someone once told me that I should blog everyday because I had the most interesting things to say. I know I won't be able to post everyday but I am going to put forth a conscious effort to post a lot more. Often times I think about posting a blog but then I don't.

My thought for today is about Texas First Bank. I have a lot of feelings towards that bank. It was there behind the teller line that I realized what I wanted to do for the rest of my life. It was there that I gained many of my most cherished friendships...

My life has been changed since the first day I walked in there.

My Love Affair With Books....

is sad. I read as much as I can while I am out of school and then for four months I read nothing but textbooks and then the ravishing of reading books for pleasure continues for just a few weeks. Rinse and repeat. In the week and a half of being off of school (not counting the week and a half I was in Texas) I read the following books:

The Giver (read again)
Why Men Earn More (not a classic but definitely interesting)
The Great Gatsby ( read again)
Pride & Prejudice ( I love the movie and just started it today. I am not yet done.)

My list of Books to read when I graudate ( just to clarify I graduate in May so that is the next time I will be able to read for pleasure again) are:

The Hobit followed by
All Three Lord of the Rings ( a Christmas gift a few years back that was never used)
Les Miserables
The Adventures of Tom Sawyer
Persuasion

And I will continue from there.

I have a dream of one day owning a library full of books I have read. I find it a shame I have not read in its entirety a list of classics. While I enjoy such authors as J.K. Rowling and Janet Evanovich I believe I must read Mark Twain, Jane Austen and many others to really be a well rounded girl.

Please, if you have read a book that changed your life, or effected your soul and you believe to be a must read (beside scriptures) please let me know. I would love to read it!

Happy New Year

Happy New Year. For the new year I would like to give you all the gift of my ramblings. I do apologize but I could not post for the 11 days I was in Texas and now I am catching up.

I really have a hard time leaving.

I have never really enjoyed New Years Eve. As much as I honestly love my life, I don't believe that I have done enough. New Years Eve is hard because I feel like I am leaving so much behind. I feel as if there was so much I could have done that I didn't do and wonder if the new year will bring about the same disappointments. I wonder what will be different at the end of 2008. At least one accomplishment I will be able to boast is my degree at the end of this year. Other than that, I don't know what else. Same job, still not married ( that might be an accomplishment in itself) these are all things I perceive will still be the same in 12 months.

Leaving Houston was surprisingly easy for me this time. I was in quiet awe that I did not feel any emotion leaving. In the past I have been excited to leave, but when the time came it literally broke my heart to leave so much of the unknown behind. (What if I stayed in Houston... how would life be different? Is going back the right thing? I am so sad to leave.... ) These are all thoughts that usually run through my mind.

Last night, as I sat in my window seat (7D of Sky West - a Delta connection) leaving George Bush Intercontinental at 6:45, half an hour past scheduled due to heavy traffic leaving -surprising because there was NO ONE in the airport- I got excited for take off. I love taking off & I love turbulence. Without these things it would not be any different than a bus ride. So the plane heads down the runway and I see tons of blue lights that turn into a blur because we are not going faster and faster and then whoosh, with a single moment we are lifted into the air and as we rise higher and higher above Houston I looked down with utter disgust. I had no feeling but bitter feelings. "I hope you choke in your nasty polluted air sleep Houston." " I hope you realize I don't miss you." Why such hate? This to a beautiful metropolitan city who has housed me for 22 years. Who kept my secrets, who embarked on journeys with me. Who filled me with joy by providing entertainment of the highest quality. Who loved me unconditionally and let me call it home. Now I feel I have betrayed it. Salt Lake is now the keeper of my secrets. I have better adventures, and funnier journeys. I call Salt Lake Home... because I feel Houston no longer has a place in it's heart for me.

While visiting friends and family was nice... it was obvious I don't belong there anymore. Salt Lake took me in as a refuge, and now calls me family. This is where I belong.

Music & Lyrics ( and much much more)

Alex Fletcher: It doesn't have to be perfect. Just spit it out. They're just lyrics.
Sophie Fisher: "Just lyrics"?
Alex Fletcher: Lyrics are important. They're just not as important as melody.
Sophie Fisher: I really don't think you get it.
Alex Fletcher: Oh. You look angry. Click your pen.
Sophie Fisher: A melody is like seeing someone for the first time. The physical attraction. Sex.
Alex Fletcher: I so get that.
Sophie Fisher: But then, as you get to know the person, that's the lyrics. Their story. Who they are underneath. It's the combination of the two that makes it magical.

So this is a quote from the actual movie music & lyrics but today I would like to discuss some stuff that I feel I always talk about. And it's not just lyrics... I believe it is just words. Written words.

My freshman English teacher, Coach Cochran ( or cap'n- the only alternative to calling him coach) was quite memorable and it wasn't just because we could ONLY go to the bathroom if we asked to go to "the potty." No one ever got away with asking to be excused to go to the powder room, the ladies room, or any other tactful way of saying it. NO. We had to ask to go potty. It was also because he taught us -or at least me- valuable lessons through his incessant ranting. Though he never set out to have a life changing class , or at least I don't think he did, he has affected my life and I think about him often.

The man was an odd man. He used to sit there staring into outer space, chewing gum, with one of those large industrial yellow rubber bands squeezing tight against the flesh of his forehead. He would just sit there, with a rubber band around his forehead as if it were a sweatband, and as if it were normal. He has said a few things that I think about often and I would like to now pass on his wisdom to you, my readers.

1) Don't touch railings while going down stairs. Do you have any idea how many people touch that who have not washed their hands, who have just coughed, or have done who knows what with it. Gross. Just don't do it. And I am proud to report that since my freshman year of high school in 1999 it has been a rare occasion that I touch the railing and I like to think of myself for being healthy for doing so.

2) Pay attention to the lyrics in the songs you are listening to. If you form a band, please do not write stupid lyrics such as " slowly walking down the hall, faster than a cannon ball, where were you while we were getting high?" ( Oasis- Champagne Super Nova) I remember him ranting that we will silly for listening to that. We needed to listen to something with meaning, or a coherent message at the least.

This ties into my Freshman year of College English class. Dr. Fox, one of the perviest teachers I have had in my college career, used to tell us that words were sometimes taken advantage of when spoken but they must never be perverted when written. What we write must be true, and to the best of our ability. I do believe this is when I started my love affair with words. I have always had an obsession with it, but my obsession was never fully formed until 2002 there in Alvin, Texas (home of Nolan Ryan). After that day I started having trouble writing essays. I wanted everything to be fully articulate and eloquently describe every fluttering thought, every deep turmoil, every pondering thought I had on the subject. I came to realize that it would never happen, but that I needed to write it down anyway.

And now as I get older I obsess over every passage in a book, every lyric in songs. Why did they write that. How beautifully they portrayed that scene.... I am obsessed. I guess what I am trying to say is this. " How do you describe so adequately those things that cannot be spoken?"

My book of choice for the plane ride back home was The Great Gatsby. An oldie, but a goody. Gatsby has this quiet love affair for Daisy, and has for YEARS. Instead of just coming out and doing something about it he shapes his life around it. FOR FIVE YEARS. When they finally meet again Gatsby shows her the clippings from the news he has kept of her for years. He tells her how he bought the house because it looks across to hers, and she always has a green light lit. Somewhere, you can sense the desperation in his voice. You sense the need to be loved, the need to be validated that he wasn't just crazy, he didn't do all of this for nothing... and yet the author never mentions this. She just writes.

I would love to discuss this one scenario in greater depth but perhaps this will be saved for another day. Too bad things that work out in books don't always work out in real life.

I wish life always seemed as beautiful as it does in books ( and songs).

Phone

Is my phone broken? Or do I just have friends that suck?

Good Lyrics

And I'm surrounded by
a million people i
still feel all alone
- lyrics from Home by Michael Buble

I have always loved lyrics. I have never been one to know the coolest latest artists, but I know the words they sing. I have always loved lyrics. I think they so eloquently express feelings and sometimes it's just adequately. However, they have a way of conveying a feeling to you. I love it.

Quite often, (more than most anyone knows) I think in lyrics or lyrics will come to my mind during a certain situation. Tonight's situation? Movie night (Martian Child- my recommendation? 3 out of 5 stars). I met up with some people at a movie theater. I arrived late and after the movie the person I knew best was separating themselves with the group to talk to another person. They left fairly quickly. There was still quite a number left in the group but I felt very uncomfortable. Then the words came to my mind... "I'm surrounded by, a million people I still feel all alone...." so I went home.

I don't understand how that phenomena works. Why do we allow ourselves to connect to some people and yet when there are a million people around us, we feel if our lives are devoid of those who we choose, then we are alone? I don't know. I can't really embelish on this post because I still haven't figured it out myself so it would just be pointless rambling.

Admendment to the Tuesday November 20th post

So... my magic mirror is back up and running!! When I wake up every morning there is a note on my mirror how beautiful and amazing i am!! if I erase it, when i wake up there is another one!! I will be sure to post a picture soon!

Pay it Forward... or behind?

So... it is no coincidence that is is 10:47 and I am writing a blog. I have a final tomorrow night I haven't studied for and a 20 page paper I haven't even put the header on.

I am stressed. In the winter I often find it much more difficult to deal with adversity than if it were the summer. Something about the lack of sunlight and the air being bitter cold that makes it hard for my body to cope. So instead I procrastinate thinking maybe I won't have to do it. Procrastination only leads to more stress, and then REAL stress when I approach whatever it is unprepared.

I suck at life! HaHa. OK so not really, sometimes I work better under pressure. I would like to write about something I just heard on the news today. A woman going through a Starbucks drive through in Pennsylvania today decided to pay for the car drinks in the car behind her. She told the cashier the only stipulation was that they had to do something good for someone else. The result? Two hours of customers paying for the other person's drink. Now... I think about this, really everyone else didn't make much of a sacrifice, their drink was paid for and they just paid for someone else's. However, this is not my point. My point is my disappointment's in whoever broke the chain. The cashier was interviewed and she said she told everyone what was going on.

" The person in front of you has paid for your drink. The only thing they ask is that you do something good for someone else. You are under no obligation to pay for the person behind you. You can just take your free drink & leave."

I imagine the last person who elected not to continue this chain as a frugal millionaire- a scrooge if you will- that went home with his double mocha frapachapalapacino double iced grande mocha low fat with skim milk and laughed maliciously while throwing hundreds of dollars of bills in the air because he just saved six.

Or... maybe it was just a mean lawyer late to a case.

Either way, with the Christmas season upon us, I think we should all take a moment to pay it forward, or behind... whichever one is most suitable for you.

2 days & counting

My parents are going to be here on Wednesday!! I can't wait!

El Dentisto-- I am sure that isn't right

So... I am sitting here waiting to go to the dentist. I was on my way to work when I realized I had a dentist appointment soon. Maybe I will blog about the dentist later. Right now, however I would like to catch you up on the dance I was dreading going to.

It was actually extremely fun! I was pleasantly surprised! Jade & I took guys that were cousins so they decided to dress alike. White suits with black pin striped shirts & skater shoes.

Us while it is snowing on Temple Square. From L-R ( Wort, Jade, Me, Miles)
A few of my favorite Gamma Girls. L-R ( Kens, Jaelyn, Jade, Me, Brooke)


After party. Decorate Gingerbread men like your date.
L-R (Me, Miles, Jade, Wort)



The finished product.

You just aren't white

So, I basically love my life. I wish I had a book that had all of the funny quotes and events that happen throughout my life.

Most of yesterday was spent with Jade. I slept in until noon, she came to church with me, and then we went to her grandparent's house for dinner. Her grandpa was showing me around the basement. He really has quite the collection of memories down there. Most things had to do with something he accomplished, or something he had done, but on the wall adjacent to the maps of lake powell, we pictures of his grandchildren. Most were broken down by families, but there were a few of the grandchildren all together. They were really cute. The following is a true reenactment.

Me: Jade! You & your cousins are really cute!
Jade: (laughter) Thanks
Me: I wish me and my cousins were that cute.
Jade: you are, you just aren't white

HaHaHa! Who says something like that? I really have no clue. She didn't say it to be mean, she just said it. I thought it was hilarious. I think she felt slightly embarrassed after that because I was giving her grief about it. Another funny thing happened just about an hour afterwards as we are leaving her grandparents. She is playing this CD and it's really soft and weird but cool and the singer is like dragging out all her words and it's really soft and Jade repeated some of the lyrics. She was like don't you think it's pretty? " I will wait for you, just hurry" (or something to that effect) and I was like oh...that's cool... what language is that. Her reply?

English!

hahaha. Obviously I wasn't REALLY paying attention. But hey! Can you blame me? Jade listens to music in all sorts of languages...

Apologies

Well folks,

A good humored fun has turned out wrong. No mal intent was meant by posting the link to my dancing parents but after talking to my dad I have decided to remove it. I would not intentionally hurt someone's feelings or try to make them feel uncomfortable... I am sorry!

Bored

OK... so I feel as if I post all the time but my highest month was June with 7 posts. I get annoyed when the rest of you don't blog so I guess I should return the favor. Not too much is going on. Well, actually TONS has happened but I guess I lack motivation to discuss it.

Let's see, in the past seven days, I have been sung Happy Birthday in two different restaurants, been to a Jazz Game, met (again) President Monson & Elizabeth Smart ( work christmas party) attended a Kurt Bestor concert, gone down to Provo to see the midnight showing of Sigur Ros' movie,



learned how to snowboard,made a pizza in the shape of Texas,

went sledding for the first time (accompanied by my first wearing of SNOW PANTS),
watched 4 movies, attended the Christmas devotional at the conference center, been to bed at 3 or later for 5 of the 7 days, and basically not been home. How I find time to study and work, and go to school in between all that is beyond me. This next week HAS to be devoid of social interaction with the exception of Friday. It is my sorority's Winter Formal & I already have a date (GAG ME). I really didn't want to go but I was pressured into it. It should be nice I suppose. The kid I am taking is pretty cool though our interaction has been sparse and not riveting, this should be interesting.... hahaha...but it is my friend's cousin so... yeah.

Did you know?

I was going through old blogs from my myspace and I found one from about two years ago. It still seems to fit... so I thought I would post it here.

1. My first crush was Trey, a boy who could DRESS HIMSELF when I was four years old. Or was I three?

2. I love when guys wrap their arms around you and you can smell their deodorent. I know I am wierd but I love it!

3. I love when guys call me by a nickname/pet name they have given me. I must have a million. It makes me so ridiculously happy and feel special.

4. I can't stand the smell of movie popcorn.

5. When I was two I was climbing a highchair and fell and busted my chin open. I still have a scar.

6. My mom and I didn't talk until I was 19 and now she is one of my best friends. Shes one of the coolest people I know.

7. I was once engaged to one of the most amazing persons I have ever met ( I called it off)

8. I have four dots on my face that form a slanted square if you connect the dots (update... I hate a lot more now)

9. I have every report card I was ever given. Starting from my Montessori school when I was four

10. My sixteenth birthday present was a two and a half week trip to Italy

11. I love going to the beach, but I hate getting in the water.

12. I was the Maid of Honor at a wedding when I was only 15! ( I couldn't even drive yet!!!)

14. I love the feeling of being at a baseball game, eating pizza, drinking Dr.Pepper and screaming and chanting SOO ridiculously loud for the Astros!!!

15. even though i think education is important, the only thing i want to do when i grow up is raise my kids and be there for my husband.

16. i haven't felt loved in a really long time

17. i actually DO love my job

18. I HATE to be woken up while sleeping. I am ALWAYS grouchy if I was not planning on waking up.

19. When I answer the phone my voice gets 12 octaves higher- I don't know why!!! My voice is high to begin with though.

20. People always tell me I am way too happy

21. I have never asked anything from a guy other than that he care about me, but I always get treated like crap.

22. I love to read & I love school

23. Older guys are more attractive but usually have more drama

24. I am a sucker for chips and salsa.

25. I LOVE asparagus.

26. I can't stand when people use more than one paper towel at a time.

27. I love to go out for sushi!

New Additions

28. I am such a social butterfly but I would rather sit at home by myself

29. I don't trust guys with my future so I don't think I will ever get married

30. I feel like I am doing nothing with my life, like my life is meaningless and I am contemplating serving a mission.

31. As much as I love my life, I also wish quite frequently that it were over. I am done. I am ready to go "HOME".

A Mandi Popsicle

So... it is cold. My fingers hurt to even type but I am hoping that typing will help warm them up. Seriously... what ever happened to 80 degree Thanksgivings? I must be thankful that we have had unseasonably warm weather here in Salt Lake. And by unseasonably warm I mean like it is 40 degrees right now. Normally it would be like oh... 10? Ha Ha. IT also has not snowed yet. Something else I am thankful for. Don't get me wrong.... I LOVE SNOW.... and I love the seasons.... just days when I don't wear a sweater because I am fooled into thinking it is going to be warm all day just because it was warm when I left....that I am bitter about my freezing extremities.

So.....I turn 23 on the 28th. Please make sure to tell me how amazing I am. My magic mirror broke so now everyday when I get up I have to tell MYSELF how beautiful I am when I look in the mirror. Not as much fun as having someone else tell you. Now where are my 7 drawfs? Hmph.

Sorry for the randomness....the cold is getting to my brain!

Emo?

Please don't think I am sad pitiful and crying in a corner. I am not. I just love looking up love quotes, especially ones that describe how I feel. I posted some to the right of this blog but here is another one for you. The sad part is that most of these have unknown authors.

"I will never regret loving you, only believing you loved me too."

The Tooth Fairy

WOW!! There is something I have been wanting to blog about lately and I keep forgetting to, and then I got out of school 20 minutes early today so I went across the street to the institute building to see if I could catch my bishop. I felt silly asking him for a blessing. No one has ever given me a blessing besides my dad and the missionaries when they lived a few apartments down and I was deathly ill....but I wanted a blessing for school and we were talking beforehand and he brought up my blog and I remembered what I wanted to blog about and was like yes! I must blog about that.... and as soon as I pressed "New Post" and the blank screen came up.... I have had a stupor of thought!!! Does this mean I was not supposed to blog about whatever it was? Or does it just mean that I am stupid? HaHa.

Regardless, what can I tell you that you did not know a week ago? November 3rd. I will not expand on that other than to say I terribly miss my MCC. My heart hurts. I am smiling through my broken heart. The question is, when your heart is already destroyed and broken and turned into mush, can it ever really be broken again? That is how I feel now. I fail to fall asleep because I am stressed about it.

"Losing you is like losing my heart."

Speaking of sleep... this is the second time I have had a dream about my teeth falling out. The first time I had that dream was October 3, 2006 and now just over a year later the same thing. In another blog I have I blogged about my teeth falling out. I had a dream that three of my teeth came out and it was the most real dream. I could feel them as I squished my tounge through my mouth and the teeth would pop out of my gums and then I would spit them into my hand. Well ladies and gentlemen, last night I had another dream but this time I lost ALL of my teeth!! Odd huh? It was so real in my dream. I could feel it all!! I wish I could link you to my other blog but you wouldn't be able to read it. It doesn't really say anything anyway. It did list a lot of the interpretations on losing your teeth although none of them fit me last time and a year later they still don't make sense.

Here are the ones that probably make the most sense for me, especially since I have been sooooooo sick for the past two months off and on.

Traditionally, it was thought that dreaming that you did not have teeth, represent malnutrition which may be applicable to some dreamers.

Other Perspectives

A scriptural interpretation for bad or falling teeth indicate that you are putting your faith, trust, and beliefs in what man thinks rather than in the word of God. The bible says that God speaks once, yea twice in a dream or a vision in order to hide pride from us, to keep us back from the pit, to open our ears (spiritually) and to instruct and correct us.

November 3rd

I can't believe it is already freaking NOVEMBER!! I just wrote that post about September ending and now it's November....seriously...... where does the time go?

Well... I just wanted to say WELCOME TO NOVEMBER 3RD!! It is my second anniversary of remembering Nov 3rd. I don't know that I really want to explain all that much about it other than that it was a day that I found out how much I really care about a dear friend who I found out had been deceiving a few people, and the day I met someone who has shaped my life since that day. I can honestly say a lot of my life could be very different if I had never met this person.

Secondly, It is now one full official year since I started my blog on blogspot. HAPPY 1st Birthday to my blog!! Well.. actually it is the day BEFORE I started my blog but since it is the day before I consider it a whole year b/c technically wouldn't tomorrow be a year and a day? I dunno the technicalities.....anyway.... it is two in the morning so maybe I will blog more later.